Monday, June 3, 2013

Who Am I? I Am Me!

A friend convinced me to start writing as a way to get thoughts out.  I needed to figure out who I really was.  I named the blogs "Who am I" not because I didn't know, but was afraid to know.  It has been about a year and a half since I started this journey.  It has been a journey of self discovery and truth.  It's been an interesting journey so far.  Many dark moments in the beginning, struggling with who I was.  I was confused, I was lost.  With the answer of who I was always with me, but hidden.  It was in plain sight, but a secret to me.  Maybe not a secret, but I was scared to admit it.  After 6 months of writing, I was finally ready to accept the truth and take the next steps.

Fast forward a year.  A year and half since the first words were written and a year since the first big steps were taken.  I have come such a long way.  I have friends and family that know, love and support me.  I have been on hormones for 6 months.  I help run social media for "GenderFest" a Transgender Social Network.  Amazing progress, at least in my mind.  If you told me 2 years ago, that this is where I would be, I would never have believed you.  But I am blessed for where I am and for how far I have come.  I have wonder friends who love me for who I am.  Ever their kids love and accept me, calling me Auntie Bryce or Bibi (Aunt in Indonesian).  One of them stopped a kid a school from making derogatory comments about the transgender community by telling them about me and feeling he needed to stand up for me.  It brings me to tears thinking about it.

I know this journey is far from over.  It will continue to have it's ups and downs.  There will still be unsure moments of what the future holds.  I pray every day that both me and my wife with have the strength to tackle whatever comes next.  But there is one thing I know.... I know who I am... I am a women.... I may not have been born with a woman's body, but I am a woman.  Some day my outer self will reflect that, no matter how long it takes.  It may take years, it may take decades, but some day.  I am taking the slow path, but at least I am on the right path.

I may change my blogs name at some point, since I know who I am now.

1 comment:

  1. Yea for you, sweetie! Such an uplifting post!!!! Congratulations on your amazing progress!

    Mega hugs,
    Cass

    ReplyDelete

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