Afraid of the Mirror

I thought as I became more accepting of myself, my fear of my reflection would go away.  Not the fear of the male reflection... I still hate having a male face look back at me, but I also fear my reflection when I dress as a woman and have makeup on.  When I try on clothes in front of a mirror, I fear I will just look like a man in woman's clothes.  When I put on makeup I fear that I will do it wrong and just look like a man wearing makeup.  Just a statement, there is nothing wrong with the Drag artform, but it is not my style and I fear that style.  Maybe fear isn't the right word.  Drag is meant to be over the top.  I want to be subtle and blend in the background.  But I look in the mirror and I think I've gone over the top.  Maybe it's because I haven't developed a style.  Maybe it's because I'm still learning to put on makeup.  I don't know.  I just don't know.