Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Down the Rabbit Hole

In my past I have done a few extra curricular activities.  I have been thinking about some of the times I did them and figured I would write about them.

My first experience was with acid.  My best friend from High School convinced me to do it when I was on break my freshman year of College.  I wasn't sure if I wanted to do it, but I figured what's the harm in a little experimentation.  I do not remember all the events of that evening but a few.  I remember putting the acid paper on my tongue.  Then as we waited for the effects to start we played 1080 (a snow boarding game on the N64).  As we played the effects of the acid started.  I remember thinking the snow was coming out of the TV.  It was an amazing feeling.  My friend showed me the true reason for black light paintings.  They were moving.  I felt like I could see the music and taste the colors.  He put on a Homer Simpson mask and I could have sworn he had transformed into Homer Simpson.  It was wild.  I remember not wanting to look in the mirror.  Not sure why... I think my friend was trying to convince me not too.  I remember looking out the window into his back yard and seeing 9 naked women dancing around a fire.  I convinced him to go outside with me and try to find them.  They disappeared.  I don't remember anything else from that night.

When I started working at an outdoor theatre in NC, ecstasy was popular and my second summer there, I was convinced to try it.  I was surrounded by friends and felt it was safe.  Everyone was giving me tips to make the most out of the experience and to be safe.  They also made sure there were a few sober people to make sure everyone was ok. I remember being handed the pill and taking it with a glass of water.  I was sitting on a couch and was told to relax and let it start.  I remember starting to feel it work in my hands.... like a warm wave.  Then my eyes started fluttering.  I felt warm and happy.  I couldn't sit still.  I felt like I was seeing the world for the first time.  No matter where I went there was always someone making sure I was hydrated.  I went out of the house onto the beach and felt the sand beneath my feet and in between my toes.  It felt so amazing.  Everyone was hugging each other and it felt so good to give and receive hugs.  One of the guys told me that frosting tastes amazing on the tongue.  He put some frosting in his mouth then kissed me with it and massaged my tongue with his.  This was the first time I kissed another guy.  It felt so good.  I didn't want to stop, but I did.  As the night progressed, all the water made me have to pee.  So I went to the bathroom to pee and there were 6 people in the shower, all naked.  They invited me to join them.  I had never been in a shower with other people before.  I was trying so hard not to stare at their naked bodies.  Most of them were dancers, so they had amazing bodies.  My hand grazed one of the guy's penis and I got shivers up and down my spine.  It was too much for me so I got out of the shower and dried off.  Soon after that a bunch of people decided to walk to the theatre and walk around it naked.  I figured hay why not.  So off to the theatre we went.  We stayed there until just before sunrise.  As the sun was coming up, I walked back to the house and then headed back to my apartment.  That was an amazing night.  I was hooked.

I became addicted to ecstasy.  I loved the feeling it gave me.  I remember almost all the times I "rolled", but some just come in flashes of one part of that night.  Here are a few more nights that stand out:

One summer at the outdoor theatre, my best friend came down to visit.  He brought some "e" with him and a couple of tabs of acid.  He sold the "e" to my normal rolling group and the acid was for me and him to candy flip (ecstasy and acid).  This was my first time candy flipping.  It was crazy.  The events of the night didn't seem to be sequential.  It was like one second it was 9pm at night then 3 am then 11pm.  Time seemed to just jump around.  I remember when the effects started.  I was sitting on the porch and all of a sudden the grain of the wood started pulsing.  The best part of candy flipping is not only do you see things because of the acid, you have the energy to go after the things due to the "e".    I remember walking down to the beach and thinking I saw a bunch of people having an orgy.  It was just rocks, but it seemed real.  Most of the night I couldn't think straight.... I was like a 5 year old again... it was so fun and I had no worries or inhibitions.

When I was in college, I used to roll with a girl and her boyfriend a lot.  They were the first ones I sort of outed myself to.  It used to be great times.  We would listen to Sublime and play Uno waiting for the effects to start.  FYI it is so hard to concentrate on playing Uno when you are rolling.  It was interesting rolling with them.  I felt very comfortable with them.  She showed me how she used a back massager to masturbate.  We would all get naked and play cards.  I would play dress up in her clothes.  One night, when my now ex wife was visiting we rolled with them and my friends sister and husband.  That night was very sexual.  That was the first time I had sex in front of anyone.  My ex made out with my friends sister.  My ex couldn't get enough of going down on me.  Stupidly we left before I realized we could of had an orgy. 

Another rolling night happened at Boo Bash in 2003.  A bunch of us decided to go and roll.  We dressed up as catholic school girls.  Out of all of us, I was the most passable as a girl.  To the point I was able to go into the girls bathroom without question.  I almost got in trouble for being in the men's bathroom because one of the security guards thought I was really a girl.  That was a great night.  I felt free and felt like a woman.

Another interesting night was rolling with my best friend's daughters mother.  They lived together but were not together.  I ended up sleeping with her that night.  I unfortunately did that because I wanted to be closer to my best friend.  I think that was the only time rolling that I did something I regretted.  I almost destroyed our friendship.  It took years to get our friendship back.

There are many more nights I could write about, but I will stop for now here.  I hope to soon roll again with my wife and one of my best friends.  That will hopefully be a fun night.  We shall see.

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